"Are you from a basketball family?" Or, a case for reminiscing on the best sport ever
6 lessons I learned from my days on the court and a few thoughts from me and a SURPRISE GUEST WRITER (spoiler alert: it's my dad aka Coach Myatt)
Start with this song.
Basketball has always been important to me: I played a LOT of basketball between ages 5 and 18, and even some intramural ball well into my early twenties. My dad was a state MVP player when he was in school, and ultimately became a high school girls basketball coach for 25 years. He was my coach for the four years of high school ball. My cousin played in college, as did her partner who also went on to play pro ball in Europe for several years.
My cousin is now a basketball coach (and a damn good one), following in what has become a family tradition: a pure love of the sport turned career choice. Both of my sisters played as well, though, my youngest sister jumped ship for tennis and cheerleading after her sophomore year. It’s still one of the more courageous acts she has ever done. My mom, while never having played competitively, is probably the biggest sports fan I’ve ever met, and basketball is her favorite.
TL;DR: I grew up in a basketball family.
Small towns in Texas come in two flavors: football towns (a la Friday Night Lights) or basketball towns. I grew up in the Friday Night Lights version of a basketball town. (My parents even had a kid while I was in high school—fiction mirroring real life.) Every Tuesday and Friday night during basketball season (fall/winter), our home gym was packed in our 2,000 person town, or half the town was traveling the 30+ miles to the neighboring town for an away game. It was the community glue.
The old gym was notorious. The saying went: “The Gruver gym’s walls sweat.” Meaning, when it was cold outside, the warmth of the hundreds of people inside caused condensation on the painted concrete walls. It freaked out all players of visiting teams. I always equated this with the Colorado Springs Olympic training facility—we trained in heightened conditions, which taught us grit and the value of hydration. The air inside was always hot—during games, every seat was taken and the crowd would buzz in anticipation. I loved it. I loved every moment of the warm-up, the tip off, the first quarter buzzer, the halftime rituals, the sound of the squeak-squeak-squeak of the players’ shoes on the lacquered wooden floors, the 4th quarter pressure, the last second shots, the wins and losses alike. It was all exhilarating.
My life revolved around the sport. In hindsight, my focus on basketball was all-encompassing and obsessive, but it worked for me. Even in the summer, I played in a competitive league and spent countless hours by myself or with friends shooting free throws or playing pick up games in the sweltering gym. There were days in the summer where my car would be parked at the gym for so long that the townfolk would call to ask my parents if Cassie’s car broke down. I ran cross country in the fall to get in shape for the season and ran track in the spring to cross-train during the off-season. All of my energy and athletic pursuits were centered around basketball.
At the time, it was simply fun. I loved the game and wanted to play it year-round. Looking back, it was more than just fun—playing this sport with the specific set of coaches and teammates was integral to who I am today. It was grounding, it was enriching, and it was challenging. I don’t even watch sports regularly anymore, but I think about basketball often. It’s nostalgic for me. Even more so, I’ve realized a lot of qualities I respect about myself (and even some I don’t, but appreciate anyway) were borne from my experience with this sport.
Here are the 6 lessons I learned from the greatest sport ever:
(in no particular order)
#1: Playing basketball is an exercise of vulnerability.
A few months ago, Nik and I were watching some March Madness, and a player shot a three-pointer airball. Nik turned to me and asked, “Is it embarrassing to air ball a shot?” Without hesitation, I said, “YES! But basketball is an exercise in vulnerability, so you shrug immediately after and then move on.” I hadn’t ever characterized it this way, but it’s so true. Basketball is extremely vulnerable (a lot of sports are, but for me, this was the most vulnerable).
The game is 5-on-5, meaning there aren’t a lot of players on the court at the same time. If you have the ball, all eyes are on you. It’s a stage performance, in a way. Some plays you get cheers, and some plays you get the dreaded “boo”—either way, you’re presenting yourself and your skills in public. You’re representing your teammates, your town, yourself. It’s scary because it’s vulnerable.
#2: Basketball makes the best sports movies and TV.
From Hoosiers to Love & Basketball to Space Jam to High School Musical, I maintain that basketball makes the best sports film, or entertainment for that matter. I mean, have you ever seen One Tree Hill?! The DRAMA. Not to mention the fact that I came of age with the Scott boys—dream boat gold standard for my developing teenage mind.
WELL, ACTUALLY, your homework assignment should be to watch any of these shows you haven’t seen. Start with Love & Basketball, and pair with cheetos and wine (the adult version of the Dr. Pepper I would drink as a teen…and honestly, just drink the DP).
#3: The fluidity of the sport taught me how to “go with the flow” (even if I don’t always listen).
Basketball, as opposed to sports like football or baseball, is fluid. There are no static positions, requiring you to go with the flow. Admittedly, this is not my strong suit by nature. Even as a young kid, I struggled with letting go. My mental health as a hormonal teenager was (looking back) actually pretty stable in large part due to my friends’ influence and basketball.
In order to do the thing I loved to do and do it well, I had to loosen my grip. Leaning into the openness of the game—the endless possibilities play by play—it’s both terrifying and also exciting. And, it requires a certain release and trust of the flow of the game, including how you trust your teammates. I enjoyed the game so much. It gave me the freedom to experiment individually or with the team, because almost ALL mistakes in basketball are NOT fatal. When mistakes are made, the only option, really, is to immediately hustle to the next play. We couldn’t waste time sulking or brooding over the mistake, or any decision for that matter, because the next play was already happening. Even when you score, it’s two seconds of elation followed by getting immediately back to defense. The pace is fast, the endorphins are high, and you learn that there’s really no choice except to go with the flow.
#4: The sport teaches strategic spontaneity.
The beauty of basketball is that there is a direct reward for paying attention to fundamentals. This is a Coach K (and Coach Myatt) mantra. Building fundamentals allows a player’s brain to focus on the unique cadence, chemistry, and plays as they come. The fluidity of basketball means that there are infinite variables, but strategic spontaneity paired with solid fundamentals makes a player a formidable opponent. The strategic aspect is what I loved so much, and excelled at. I wasn’t the best athlete on any team I played on (by any stretch of the imagination), but I was smart and disciplined. And, I could shoot “the lights out.” There’s some life lessons in this in obvious measure.
#5: Basketball was a common language with girls who I wouldn’t have otherwise had a lot in common with.
I had my core friend group and a lot of them played basketball, save my best friend who stopped playing early in high school. The girls who I played with in high school were older and younger and a mix of band nerds, lit geeks, true jocks, rodeo queens, rocker chicks, and cheerleaders. We all had other skills and interests but the common denominator was basketball. The two+ hours we spent every day in practice were some of the best hours of high school for me. We had fun, we worked hard, we sweat our asses off. And we won games. All four years of high school varsity play ended in the playoffs, and my junior year we made it all the way to the state finals (losing, tragically, by 5 in the championship). Regardless of never achieving a state champion title, I have nothing but fond and nostalgic memories of my time with my teammates over all four years.
#6: Basketball personally allowed me to spend more time and bond with my family, particularly my dad.
I used to joke that I was playing basketball from the time I exited the womb. It isn’t far from the truth. From the time I could walk, I waddled onto the court post-game to shoot hoops with my dad and his sweaty players. I remember my hands and arms being barely big enough to hold the ball myself. My dad would pay me a nickel for hitting the net. As I grew taller, he gave me a quarter for making baskets, and then a dollar for “nothin’ but net.”
By the time I was in middle school and high school, he was my actual coach. At the time, I would get frustrated or mad at “Coach Myatt” for being harder on me than the other girls, but eventually I understood that was intentional—he wanted me to earn respect on my own merit, not just because I was the coach’s kid. And, also, my mom mandated for us one specific mandate: “don’t bring the court home.”
Further into adulthood, I saw how lucky I was: how many teenagers can say they spent a dedicated two hours a day during school months with their father? Even more amazing is that all my close friends got to know him too. To this day, most of them still call him “Coach Myatt” even though he hasn’t coached in over a decade.
As I was mulling over this topic, it dawned on me—I want to hear what my dad—Coach Myatt—has to say. So, I asked him to give me his thoughts—on basketball’s lasting legacy in his own life and what his memories were on playing basketball as a kid himself. We’re all in luck—he agreed to let me share his words with you today. He is, after all, the father of the “Well…Actually” Girl.
Coach Myatt’s Thoughts on Basketball:
Some of my strongest memories of my childhood involve sports with my brother and my dad. My dad was a farmer and we lived 15 miles from town so the isolation was palpable.1 But I had my brother, and I had my dad, and sports served to bond us together. My dad always had a basketball goal put up.
Our first goal was nailed to the garage wall. The second goal was a "real" goal. Pole sunk in the ground with concrete, regulation height, regulation backboard. Pretty good for a sharecropper farmer as this was before we even had a television and or Central AC. The "court" was packed dirt that my dad periodically bladed with his tractor so that the ball bounced consistently. Each evening the routine was always to first wash our hands—playing basketball on a dirt court for hours made for dirty hands but our hearts were clean!
The "court" was packed dirt that my dad periodically bladed with his tractor so that the ball bounced consistently.
Combine this with discussions about "team basketball" led by my dad, and, after we finally got a black-and-white television, watching the Boston Celtics led by Bill Russell, my philosophy for the game, and life, was beginning to take root. The team was always foremost. Winning, and doin’ so the right way, were much more important than individual goals, accomplishments, and accolades.
An interesting note: in the spring of 1969, my dad took me and my brother to a playoff game in Abernathy (where we went to school) between Dimmitt and Lockney. While the players were warming up, my dad pointed at a bespectacled young coach prowling the Dimmitt sideline. "That's the best coach in the State of Texas right there, boys,2" we were informed.
When we moved to Dimmitt Christmas break before New Year's 1970, the farm we rented had a huge quonset barn. My dad put up a goal inside the barn and we had space heaters also. So in the dead of winter, I had an INDOOR basketball court (with cement floor!) and goal! I was in basketball heaven. I could now shoot and play 365 days a year.
As a tall young boy who LOVED basketball I became a huge fan of Bill Walton and the UCLA Bruins. Here is a quote that summarizes Bill Walton as good as any I have seen:
"I went to my first show [of the Grateful Dead], got right up front and never left. The incredible excitement, the family, the spirit, the hope, the happiness, all the different things I love and live for in life are there. The joy, the optimism, the teamwork, the experimentation, the exploration, the curiosity. No band has inspired more artwork, no band has inspired more books. No band has ever inspired a more loyal following and I'm involved in all of that stuff." —Bill Walton
In my opinion, the GREATEST sports movie of all time is centered on basketball. It is "Hoosiers". A story of redemption for a coach, a small town in Indiana, and a young man who has faced difficulties no young child should ever have to face. Several quotes and thoughts run through my mind when I consider this movie:
"Team, team, team, No ONE more important than the other"
"Pass the ball four times before you shoot"
"Oh, I wish I could be there!"
and, of course,
"I love you guys"
All these thoughts and philosophies led to my coaching career and having 3 daughters led to being a girls basketball coach. It was fun, rewarding, and I am truly blessed to have coached my own children! We won some big games, we lost some big games, but the truth is that the memories of the people involved and the common purpose of our girls, our community, and our school was what really mattered.
—Steve Myatt
My dad grew up in a small town northwest of Lubbock, Texas, in the Texas panhandle. Dimmitt, Abernathy, and Lockney are all small towns around that area. Dimmitt was ultimately where Coach Myatt played high school ball (and graduated) under the renowned Kenneth Cleveland, one of the greatest high school basketball coaches in history.
The coach was Kenneth Cleveland. There’s a small press book about him (author is his wife) called Letters to Coach. He was one of the best high school basketball coaches in the country for several years. Here’s a gorgeous ‘primary source’ material from dad and his teammates about Coach Cleveland:
Steve Myatt-- Class of '75
"Cleveland Gym will always be a special place to me, but to be honest--not anywhere close to being as special to me as Coach was. My first memory of Coach was when we still lived at Abernathy, and I did not even suspect that we would ever move to Dimmitt. J.H. took Layne and I to a Dimmitt playoff game (Bobby Baker!) at Abernathy versus Lockney, I believe. J.H. pointed Coach out when we arrived and said, "There is the Dimmitt coach, Kenneth Cleveland...he is the best coach anywhere."
Probably the best feeling I ever had was after the Christmas break of my 8th grade year. I had come to Dimmitt as the best player on Abernathy's team and couldn't even crack the top 10 at Dimmitt in the 7th grade. J.H. kept telling me to work very hard and try to impress Coach and catch his eye. It happened the first workout after Christmas break during my 8th grade year. Over the holiday period, I had worked SO hard and practiced in the indoor barn gym J.H. had made. Our barn had a heater, a cement floor, and a basketball goal that J.H. had put up. He cleaned out that part so we would have room to play. I practiced and practiced to try to learn how to shoot the ball like Mark Wohlgemuth and make moves like Kent Bradford. The first practice back after the break, I did well. Coach called me over after practice and said, "Steve, what did you do over the holidays?" I said, "I practiced basketball all day, every day, Coach!" And then he said a simple thing that is still with me: "I can tell how hard you worked, Steve." That's all it took. I was hooked. I was now a Bobcat! I still didn't start on the 8th grade team, but I played more. I didn't even start as a 9th grader on the freshman team, but I kept working, and kept getting more and more playing time. By my sophomore year, I started on the JV and spent all the time in the gym I possibly could. By my senior year, I had worked so hard for so long and dreamed of being a Bobcat and going to state, that it just seemed natural. Unbelievable memories!"
I have to be honest! I was NOT the MVP of the State Tournament…I did play on the State Champion Dimmitt Bobcats but I was selected to the THIRD team All-State because I played on the State Champion…The memories are rich and comforting and we are one year from the 50th anniversary of our championship!
why am i crying while reading Well Actually 🙃